Subliminal Innuendo

Currently Listening To :: The Sweetest Thing :: Lauryn Hill

One late afternoon last week, I was gazing out of the windows of the Union Offices at the Blockhouse, watching the (uni) world go by. As I continued to absently stare out from the office, I noticed a couple, standing on the walkway. Every time I glanced up from my work, there they were. I began to take an interest in the couple, and I began to wonder what they were doing in the walkway, two pillars amidst a wash of surging humanity.

However, I wasn’t the only one who had noticed the couple, and what started as passing remarks became a small debate on what exactly were they doing. Were they breaking up? “Look at the way she’s hanging her head and slumping over!” Or were they just old friends who had happened to bump into each other on the walkway? “But look at how his hands are relaxed by his side!” Everyone had their own theory as to what was happening, and we became so engrossed in the debate that we didn’t even notice the couple disappearing from the walkway unnoticed, leaving us to question…

Long before humans could even talk, we communicated in a language without words, that universal language of expression, gesture and intuition. Even today, the point is driven home by my little niece who, when she wants her milk warmed up, makes a circular motion with her index finger, the same spinning motion a tray in a microwave makes. Kids these days…

From the time we learn to construct our first sentence, we begin to lose our ability to speak without words. It’s not that we forget how to, but as we’re increasingly able to articulate our wants and needs in spoken word, we begin to forget how to read unwritten and unspoken nuances, so much so that today we now converse in highly overt and impersonal ways. We talk to our phones instead of to each other. We gaze at our computer screens instead of who we’re talking to. We listen for amplified voice patterns instead of inclination. If written word took the magic out of spoken word, then spoken word definitely stole the soul from what is unspoken.

Hunger, remorse, pain, love, and sexual desire; these are just some of the base human needs that transcend traditional language barriers. Take flirting for example. While I’m not out to write the definitive explanation to this ancient art, I’m sure everyone has their own ideas on what flirting entails, and I’m also sure everyone has wondered at times if someone is flirting with them or “just being friendly”. Holding the gaze of someone you’re attracted to can be thought of as flirting by one person, or the unwanted attentions of some potentially psychotic stalker by another.

Now I’m not advocating we discard words wholesale and spend our lives trying to decipher hidden meanings in the body language of others (which is what a lot of us men do when trying to understand women!). But if actions do in fact speak louder than words, than no matter how loud we shout, a shift of the stance or a wink of the eye will always beat the email or the sms.

So if the sweetest thing you’ve ever known was the feeling of a kiss on your collarbone, there’s still hope for us all. But if you’re idea of flirting is confined to caressing your phone to send short message services of sexual innuendo, then the threat to the human race isn’t nuclear or chemical war; the real threat is the reason why we’re in such a mess worldwide today.

Poor communication.